[on a guy my friend hooked up with who she later managed a platonic friendship with]:
he’s the girlfriend i never had.
[by my friend living in the UK after seeing me 1 year later]:
there are 2 mysteries in life:
1. why people queue to Nando’s
2. why you’re single
[by my friend when she was tipsy … or drunk]:
it’s so stupid how i get tipsy after one drunk.
[by my friend about a coworker]:
apparently she did masters abroad. What exactly did she master?
[by my friend about siblings]:
my sister and i are so different. You’d never see her cleavage ever.
[about a friend who got screwed over by a guy]:
her bullshit detector wasn’t really working.